Improve your Interpersonal Skills

The art of cultivating a positive outlook.
“Think positive, smile, be positive, look on the bright side,” as the magazines write.
Seeing and considering (prophesying) the best will actually give you a better chance of having a happy life.
At least you can be aware of the filters of perceptions (selection, interpretation and generalization) that distort your view of reality, often in a very negative way.

Many conflicts emerge because we do not know how to set boundaries. We don’t know how to say no like adults because we lack the self-confidence. Or we say no too late or too aggressively, so conflict erupts.
In this video we will first see why we don’t dare to say no, then how to say no to a request and finally how to say no to an attitude that doesn’t suit us.

What are we playing at?
Relationship difficulties and conflict, often take on the form of a several act tragedy, in which we play different scenes.
Arguing, fleeing, complaining, accusing, arm wrestling or looking for support.
Are we victims, rescuers or persecutors in this psychological game that is the dance of conflict? Do we move from one role to another without even realizing it?

Nowadays, there are EQ tests, Emotional Quotient, calculated just like an IQ, Intelligence Quotient, to assess people’s ability to recognize emotions, understand and manage these emotions, either their own or those of others. A mature emotional intelligence is an essential key in communication, assertiveness and conflict management. What does emotional intelligence provide? How to manage negative emotions? And finally, how can we improve our Emotional Quotient on a daily basis?

Would we find ourselves in the middle of a conflict if we asserted ourselves healthily? My answer is “no”. Asserting ourselves in a healthy way, within a respectful and equal relationship with others, prevents us from giving in to the dance of conflict, even if the other person is urging us to.
I am going to describe the basis of this quiet affirmation (this assertiveness) through the concept of life positions (OK/not OK) inspired from Transactional Analysis.